Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Looking on the Bright Side

People who follow me on Blogger via more avenues than just this particular blog have probably noticed that I've been working on posting regularly again over the past week or so. When I'm in the habit of popping in and firing off a quick entry as often as I should be, deciding what to post about is never a big deal. It's always just whatever came to mind that day or because of recent life occurrences. However, when I haven't been around for a while, it becomes more of "a thing".

Somehow, even though I've yet to really set aside the time to make my public blogs all I would truly like them to be, I appear to have readers at all three of them, which is something of a motivator. I'm more concerned with posting regularly in blogs once I realize other people actually give a shit whether or not I'm posting, as opposed to feeling like I'm just chattering away to myself.

I mostly opened this third one for me, because I personally didn't really see where that many people would be interested in hearing me ramble about my spiritual life, astrology, tarot, or anything else along those lines -- especially since most of my existing friends and e-acquaintances don't consider themselves to be very spiritual themselves. However, this is actually the blog that has attracted the most interest somehow and I've been getting e-mail and inquiries as to when I might plan on posting here again, as well as suggestions for posts and articles that particular readers might like to see.

There are lots of subjects I hope to tackle in the near future, just for the information of those who have asked. I'd like to write some basics in regards to what astrology and tarot are really all about, as I appear to have some beginners reading who would really like some advice in this arena. I also want to start focusing more on specific astrological concepts that I consider to be important, despite the fact that I don't hear them mentioned by other astrologers as often as I feel they should be. Last but not least, I'd like to start making this blog (and all of my Blogger blogs) a little more personal, as I've decided there's not enough of "me" on my public pages to suit me.

All that said, I stumbled across this prompt at Pagan Blog Prompts earlier and thought it might be a good segue into some of what I've been yammering about above. It's certainly appropriate as far as where my mind has been as of late.

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For a lot of people, finding the good in any situation is tough... but the old adage says to "look on the bright side" as a way to encourage you to search out the good in what appears to be nothing but bad.


Do you find strength to look on the bright side from your faith? Or does it come from somewhere else?


If you have trouble finding the good in everything, what steps would you take to change that?


........

I've never been by nature what most people would think of as a positive person... at all. Not only have I had issues with depression and anxiety since I was really little, but I grew up around a number of other big worriers, so it's second nature for me to think negatively and focus on everything that's going wrong in my life, while completely overlooking most (if not all) of what's going right. Seeing the positive in situations that are clearly negative has always been especially difficult for me. However, I would say that my spiritual beliefs and involvement with astrology have both really made a positive difference in the way I deal with that sort of thing though.

Gradually becoming more spiritual and more in tune with the universe has helped me to accept that there really are reasons for everything that happens. I know it sounds like the same trite garbage you're already tired of hearing if you're not spiritual, but it really is something that I feel is true. I have also learned that there are lots of ways of coming to understand what those reasons might be through one's spiritual practices, whether that's prayer, meditation, divination, or something else entirely. At that point, the proper path forward tends to present itself to me and if I am open to taking it, I find I can finally stop running into the same old obstacles over and over again.

Before, I was far more likely to drive myself crazy weighing decisions, trying to control every last aspect of the outcome, and blaming myself when I wasn't able to cultivate some perfect life for myself and those around me regardless of whether or not I did my best. In addition to being conditioned to be a worrier from early on, I was considered to be highly gifted and genius-level smart as well. This means I also grew up feeling as if I should be able to accomplish things other people can't... even things that really aren't possible or realistic to expect of anyone, regardless of how smart they are. For years, I didn't just let it go or move past things if I hit a brick wall or when certain things about life actually turned out to be harder for me than they are for other people. I beat myself up instead... mercilessly, because I believed people when they said someone as smart as I am should be able to do anything and that the only possible reason for my struggles in life must be laziness.

I've always struggled with feeling like I'm not good enough, like I don't deserve to be happy, and especially like I disappoint other people to the point where they probably wish they didn't know me at all. This is not something I was able to get past until I reached a point in my life where I began to find myself spiritually. Once I began to see the rhyme and the reason as to how the universe works, how karma works, how energy works, why certain individuals are presented with the challenges that they are, and especially how I could use all that knowledge to make my life better and more productive, I finally began to break out of that prison and move forward. I was really late in doing it -- into my 30's even, which still embarrasses me to admit -- but better late than never, I suppose!

My faith in the cosmic order of things and my unique place in that order is sometimes the only thing that keeps me going in life when things get really bad. More than once, it has saved me from giving up on life altogether in every way that you can imagine, including some of the most macabre. It continues to be something that keeps me strong, guides me, inspires me, and motivates me to be as positive a force as possible in other people's lives as well. Most importantly of all, it's helped me realize that I don't have to do or achieve anything special in order to deserve kindness or happiness. I was born "good enough" for that... so I really just try to start there when I find myself frustrated,  upset, or feeling negative.